Better Marriage Commitment
The most important factor in marital happiness is the level of emotional commitment rather than any other factor including money and division of household chores. The mistake that most couples make is to take the marriage vows casually. At the time of the wedding ceremony these look frivolous because both are too focused on the new life they are entering into. You lose all interest in what the Minister is a saying the moment he starts by asking you whether you will take this woman as your wedded wife. You say to yourself that it is ridiculous to ask because that is why you are there. But all that has a meaning. When you say yes, I do, you are committed to your mate. By the time the ceremony is over you have agreed to share your life with your partner and have taken the step after due diligence. It is then obligatory on both you and your spouse to make all efforts to make the marriage work despite pitfalls.
Many people fear commitment and prefer to live together without marrying. But you are still committed. The only difference in that case is that you have not committed in a Church or in front of family, friends and community but to your partner. Committedness has different meanings for a man and a woman. Irrespective of what women say about equality they are happy only when the husband is a good provider. Most men, on the other hand, are still a bit chauvinistic. These traits play a strong role in marriage relationships when realties dawn upon both husband and wife.
Couples who love commitment find that happiness is easier in married life. Fairness does matter in shaping marriage relationships. Women are happier when household chores are fairly divided. That not only makes the relationship equitable but also allows spending quality time together. Problems arise when the division is not 50-50 in double income households.
Fear of commitment and marriage do not go together. Marriage by it very nature means that you are committed to a set of responsibilities. And these responsibilities go far beyond household chores, financial support and marital duties. You are committed to be faithful to your spouse, to love and care for each other.
The edifice of a better marriage is built on the foundation of your allegiance to your spouse. The desire to nurture a marriage relationship comes automatically when you are committed to the promises you make to your spouse and yourself. Love flows from your allegiance and your partner is becomes your ‘other half.’
You marry only after you have known each other for some time and discovered that some level of compatibility exists between you two. One out of you expresses a desire to enter into a serious relationship of marriage. When the other person accepts, the commitment is already made regardless of whether you get married in a Church or elsewhere.
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